Making friends is an important skill. We all need and want friends, but what is the best way to get them. Here are some tips.
1.) Don't expect another person to talk to you. The chances are it won't happen. Make conversation first. The best things to say are open ended and involve something you both are sharing together. For example, let's say you are standing in a long line at the movies. You could ask the person next to you if they know how long the wait might be. You might get a short "I don't know" answer, but that is fine and shows a lot of progress. You can try another question that does not have a right or wrong answer, like do you know any other good movies playing now. That might spark an interest and conversation. Sometimes you can just get a person that does not want to talk. Maybe they had a bad day. Try the same thing on another person until you get someone who clicks with you.
2.) Pretend the person you are about to talk to is actually a cousin of yours and it is the first time you are meeting them. Think about how glad you are to talk to them. That genuine feeling will be transmitted to the other person by your tone of voice, facial expressions, smile and body language. It is so powerful, that they might even start talking to you first.
3.) Maintain eye contact, but not too much. Looking a person in the eye shows trust. Too much can make them uncomfortable, but not enough will make it seem like you are up to something bad. You will know what is enough. Just use your own common sense. If you have a problem making eye contact, you can look at them just above their eyes, like above the bridge of their nose which is almost as good. Over time you will get better at it.
4.) Practice. If you are at the store, you can practice a bit even with the cashier. If they ask you "how are you doing," try something more than "fine." Just take baby steps. Maybe you can ask them how their day is going, or comment about an item and if they have tried it. Practice makes perfect when it comes to being a well liked person with friends.
