Lots of stuff to vent about so long and boring blabbering! So there is a "friend" i have i think i have talked about her before and she thinks she is so high and mighty and better than everyone else and super arrogant and spoiled, very much a brat. also she is super self absorbed and selfish. every wednesday we go to the library she comes to my last period class before class even ended cuz her teacher lets her out early and then if I am not done packed up and ready in literally 2 mins she leaves without me... she also speaks hungarian as her first language and english as her second. she also likes reading, like me. SHE FRIGGIN THINKS SHES BETTER THAN ME AT ENGLISH LIKE DUDE YOU SPEAK HUNGARIAN THATS PRETTY HARD TO BE BETTER THAN ME AT LANGUAGES also how entitled can you be?? also says the person who in fourth grade (we are in 7th now) was so bad at advanced english she almost got kicked out of the program?? I have been in advanced for YEARS!! She got in in fourth grade so I have been here for 2-3 ish years more than her. She thinks she reads more advanced books so is so much better than me in any way possible concerning reading, when really I just read books that were written earlier bcuz i dont really love classics BUT THEY ARE THE SAME EXACT READING LEVEL OF NOT MINE IS HIGHER THAN HERS UGH!! so yeah generally annoying. Also my mom definitely favorites my sisters over me. She always yells at me for the smallest things and things that they did, one time my older sister threw my ipad AT THE CEILING and MADE A LITERAL HOLE IN THE CEILING my mom really said hon, be more careful she then proceeded to turn around and said why did you let her throw your ipad go to your room until dinner no desert for the rest of the week. And now they always ignore her but I never ignore her, I talk to her, and then she acuses me of debating against her or arguing and gets super mad and I get super mad too but go to my room to cool off then my mom pretends like it never happened and I am feeling super guilty which is unfair bcuz why should I have to feel guilty?? My mom also did something bad, did something worse? and my sisters straight up ignore her and they aren't guilty. And my parents are divorced my dad is remarried just so you know and they constantly fight and put me in the middle, so I have to be almost a messenger+ a therapist+ a punching bag to absorb their apparent hatred for each other. And one time I wanted to rock climb I like climbing and I am pretty tall, so I am not bad at it. I wanted to join this monthly program you can start by just paying for one month you can go as many times as you want and rent the equipment if you need it for like $50. Anyway, my parents argued and argued for months. Then the place I was going to go to went out of business. My sisters Synchronized swimming. Its like dance+swimming and basically you gotta pay for going to the pool and using it, buying the goggles, swim caps, and practice suits. Then you gotta pay for flights, hotels, and food for the whole team, which is like 30-40 swimmers including all of the age groups. Then there is swimsuits, multiple suits per swimmer, and they are custom, bejeweled, hand sewn suits that can range from about $50-$200!! SO EXPENSIVE!! I did it for 1-2 years ish I didn't like it so I stopped. Well, aparently, now because my sisters already do an expensive sport I can't do any sport. I do track in the spring through my school, and that is free. I do theatre through my school in fall, and that costs $50 for a shirt for each person, props, and costumes. But if I want to do anything else they either constantly argue or they just straight up say no. It almost seems like first come first serve, yk? Like, my sisters found a sport they liked and because they founf the sport they wanted to do before i did now they get to do the sport they do and I don't get to. Like, joined an a cappela thing this year that costs a FRACTION of my sisters sport. its not cheap, but not terrible. That was hard to get my mom to agree to. I tried for like 8 months. But I want to audition for the more advamced group which costs like double or triple because in the advanced group we go on internation trips to a cappella conventions, and I don't think I can get my mom to agree. And I'm almost done dont worry. One of my dog's name is shep. He was there when one of my old dogs died and was there to cuddle with me, to play with me, to cheer me up in general. Without him I probably would have gotten depressed. Anyway, his 7th birthday was in april and that is the average lifespan for his breed. And he isn't that healthy, especially because he goes back and forth from my moms to my dads house when we do. so I know, and always have known, that he will die someday. But i am so afraid that It will be too soon and he will not have been happy, he will have been suffering, and what will I do without him? And at least I have my other, younger dog. I won't have no dog. Yeah, but my other dog stays at my dad's house, and I am with my mom more than I am with my dad, so I don't have as good of a relationship with him as I do with my other dog. And I am so scared of that and a million other things.
Thanks for reading all this, and sorry if I offended anyone or if I sounded mean, but that's the point of a vent, isn't it?
