Hi!! You seem to be in quite the pickle! :O
I just want to say first of that while it is okay to inform your friend on your opinions on LGBTQ+, you shouldn't try and pressure her to accept those ideas. I'm also not certain that "homophobic" and "transphobic" is the right terminology- she nor her family have a "fear" of trans or gay people, do they?? They merely don't accept or support those ideals. Which is okay, right!? People are allowed to pick and choose what they support and don't support, and I 100% agree with that!!
I do not support LGBTQ+. I think it is wrong both physically and morally, but I will tolerate people who are of the community and their ideas, as long as we both stay in our own lanes. If someone who is gay starts pressuring me to accept their ideas or to go far out of my way to do so, then there is a problem. And this goes for anything, really!! Politics, religions, even hobbies XD
Heck, I had lesbian friends all throughout middle school. I was able to stay good friends with one until I moved away- in fact, we were complete opposites in almost every way possible!! But we both knew what each other believed in, and with that knowledge we didn't have to spread our ideals to each other or pressure each other to accept them. She knew I don't support LGBTQ+, I was more conservative when it came to politics (these days I can't really stand either party so I am independent), and she knew I was a hard-core Christian. Heck, and then he was a liberal, lesbian girl who loved to cut her hair short and dye it all sorts of colors! But somehow we accepted our differences and became great friends. I still wonder how she's doing these days, and I will sometimes pray that she figures things out and lives her life how she is supposed to, in whatever way that is :)
I couldn't hang out with many other's from the LGBTQ+ community because they were so over-the-top about it, and often very mean aswell. I couldn't have a conversation with them about a lot, as they would always relate it back to being gay or trans or whatever. They would also pressure me ALL THE TIME into accepting their beliefs, and when I didn't or disagreed, I got labeled as homophobic or whatever "-phobic" applied. Or when I was hit on by people who were not of my sexuality and would keep pushing, and when I would say no and why they would become salty.
And people are 100% allowed to distance themselves from people who believe in whatever if they disagree with it, and that's not wrong either!! In fact, I've tended to do that as I've gotten older, and will probably choose to keep my family away from it too. But that's not wrong, because you are totally allowed to do the same when it comes to anything!!
Also, you can't just not believe that an action is a thing. Like, you can't "believe" in science. It's a fact. Being gay is an action. She can choose not to follow or accept those beliefs, but it is a thing. As for the gender thing?? That's a whole other thing!!
Anyways, I'm sorry for the long rant and story time XD I hope you come to realize that even if she isn't your friend anymore, that is her and her family's choice, not yours. I pray for you, and I truly hope everything works out AMAZING for you!!
And if you are gay, so what?? Just don't make it your whole personality, and things may work out :))
I hope this helped, and I also hope I didn't come across as mean, rude, or insensitive. Best of luck, and lmk how things go!! :D
