I know its pathetic to miss your mom and think that this sudden death is all your fault but I can't help it you guys. I just feel like this is all my fault and I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I miss my mom. I miss her so much. I already told Joel in private messages what really happened (Gamekid aka Anna please don't get mad that I talked to Joel I'm sorry ok??) but I guess I will just juice up my courage and tell you guys what REALLY happened that night.
Ok.
I guess I am going to say it.
Yeah probably.
Why am I not crying??
I guess it feels old.
But why??????
Why do I have to be parentless at 12??
But if you want to here it then I will tell you. I was literally eating dinner and getting ready for bed and I was talking to the twins when the phone rang. My aunt went to get the phone and her face turned so pale she looked like she had seen a ghost. I was totally scared about what happened. She said "are you sureL "how when who??" And then she hung up and had tears in her eyes and she came to hug me. She said "Chelsea that was the police". Your mother was found at a club on the floor and she was taking some things she should not have taken and she...she didn't make it. She died." When I heard those words I just about fainted. I just stood there. I got Goosebumps. I felt like I could not get in any air. All I could do was whisper "are you sure" and she said yes".
I have to leave out a ton of parts I know you are very mature and you can definitely here those parts but I want it to get approved by kidztalk moderators so I am keeping it clean.
Here is the part that makes me cry so hard though.
At least with my dad I was holding his hand when he passed away and I was with him. But my mom..
I love her.
And..and
ii didn't even get to say goodbye to her.
-Chels
